LIB PIGS

Liberals gathered in their masses
just like perverts on big asses
clueless minds that plot destruction
sorcerers of taxes' construction
in the fields the money's burning
as the truth machine keeps turning
death and hatred to Western-kind
watching their networth grow over time,
oh Lord (or acceptable multicutural diety here) yeah!

Ontarians hide themselves away
they only demand for more
Why should they go out to fight?
They leave that role to The Star
Time will tell on their power minds
Fucking the West just for fun
Treating people just like dogshit on their shoes
Wait 'till their judgement day comes, yeah!

Now in darkness, the West stops paying
Westerners have just stopped caring
No more Lib pigs of the power
Hand of God (or acceptable multicutural diety here) has struck the hour
Day of judgement, God (or acceptable multicutural diety here) is calling
on their knees, the Lib pigs crawling
Begging mercy for their sins
I, laughing, incinerate them.

OH LORD (or acceptable multicutural diety here)YEAH!


PS An interesting note here. I was in the Lecturer's lounge last night, y'know, getting high and talking about Marx, when I got up to take a...use the washroom. Seeing as I had eggs for lunch,I knew I'd be awhile and grabbed The Japan Times, a daily English newspaper. Well, burried on page 12 at the bottom was the article "Canadian Government Survives Critical Vote". At first I was like, "Holy Shit! How old is this paper?!" I looked at the date, May 27 2005. The paper was that day's edition. The story was about the budget vote last week. So, either the newspaper is crap at getting organised, which it's past track record shows to be false, or internationally Canada and its politics are a joke.

Having been a Canadian, I knew the answer.

Yum Yum

Classes were OK tonight. My hands still have chalk on them. I haven't used the chalk as a projectile...yet. I can't take it all too seriously, I can only meet the kids halfway. I don't need to learn about Carthage, they do. If they don't practice (the class is done in English), or do their homework, that's their problem.

While at work, it started to rain. Rainy season has started. It'll probably rain everyday until July 1st and then it will be hot as the centre of the sun for 2 months. Hooray. Regardless, on my way home I stopped in at a convini and bought a beer. I looked at the nuts section, but all they had was a bunch of shitty peanuts and dried seafood stuff. I might feed that to someone I hated, or to a dog...if I wanted to see them vomit all over the place.

I made my way to the counter and pushed an oldman out of the way. He froze when I yelled "Who won the war, eh?!! Eh?!!" and shook my fist at him. He didn't go away until I threw a bunch of lighters at him. My new completely shaven hair style added to the effect. Anyway, I bought my beer and the lady behind the counter gave me the old "sabisu". I then threw a motor scooter through the window and cackled madly into the rainy night.

"Sabisu" means "service", or free shit. Free shit indeed. I got home and inspected what treasure of snackdom I scored for free. Ugh, fuckity, ugh, ugh. Nuts with small dried fish.

Thanks for the old stock. The expiry date is O D15Q, whatever the fuck that means. Other fantastic flavours offered by the "Bourbon" snack company of Tokyo are "Seafood beans", "Peanut Octopus mix", and the timeless favourite "Salted Guppies".

Yum. Yum.

PLAN 10...

Fuck Yeah! \M/

Plan 10....

Plan 10....

Plan 10! FUCK YEAH!

Coming again, to save the mother fucking day yeah,

Plan 10, FUCK YEAH!

Separation is the only way yeah,

Fiberals your game is through cause now you have to answer too,

Plan 10, FUCK YEAH!

So lick my butt, and suck on my balls,

Plan 10, FUCK YEAH!

What you going to do when we come for you now,

it’s the dream that we all share; it’s the hope for tomorrow

.

.

FUCK YEAH!

.

.

Watami, FUCK YEAH!

Matsuya, FUCK YEAH!

Tokyu Hands, FUCK YEAH!

J-League, FUCK YEAH!

Leafs, FUCK, YEAH!

Heavy Metal, FUCK YEAH!

Free Downloads, FUCK YEAH!

Slavery, FUCK YEAH!

.

.

FUCK YEAH!

.

.

GTA3, FUCK YEAH!

Beer, FUCK YEAH!

Porno, FUCK YEAH!

Weed, FUCK YEAH!

Sandals, FUCK YEAH!

Jim Morrisson, FUCK YEAH!

Sleepin' late, FUCK YEAH!

Star Trek, FUCK YEAH!

Cigarets, FUCK YEAH!

Engrish

(Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah)

.

.

Liberty, FUCK YEAH!

Ancient Rome, FUCK YEAH!

The Pub, FUCK YEAH!

Rolling Papers, FUCK YEAH!

Wrestling, FUCK YEAH!

Christmas, FUCK YEAH!

420, FUCK YEAH!,

Ozzy, FUCK YEAH!

Reformers, FUCK YEAH!

Tories

(Tories?)

(fuck yeah, fuck yeah)

Ottawa,

Les Habs

In less than 24 hours

In less than 24 hours, Mr. Metal Cool jr., or whatever he is calling himself these days (definitely not "sloth,chunk, friend") will owe me 2 pints of beer. Hooray, boyee!

Pint number one was won on his website where I guessed the name of the tune and the band. You can see the evidence here.

Pint number two was a bet made on the phone on Sunday night. I bet his Metallic Coolness that the Liberals would survive the confidence vote to reign in self-righteous Lower Canadian glory over the masses of extra chromosome carrying prols. Well, the clock is ticking and I learned long ago never bet on the team you want to win. Don't believe me? Bet on the Leafs just once and you'l be a convert.

Also, I am no longer an unemployable bum. I am now underemployed bum. I am teaching at a University in Tokyo. I teach Engrish and a little Classics (It's like trying to explain Hercules to 4 year olds). What is really sad is that when I teach the "kids" I realise that even the smart ones in high school are idiots.

Not me. I'm a genius.

I'm a genius who has two pints waiting for him in kegs back in the Union of Soviet Socialist Provinces of Canada.

The Hidden Agenda

I checked google with a search for "Harper's hidden agenda" and got this article from CTV. Just one of 20,000 hits. My favourite one was this. Maybe buddy should stop eating the stuff off of the floor of the cage he rattles. "Harper's hidden agenda BREAK UP CANADA so we become part of the U.S.A." Yeah, heaven forbid we fight back. Good thing since the 1960s the Liberals have made Canada a nation of pussy Hab fans incapable of doing anything except sucking cock and reading the Toronto Star. I really do want to rant and rave about that one, but I have hidden agendas to write about.

Martin's Hidden Agenda.

Steal tax money and live the high life off of other people's money. Place all your buddies in places of power to maintain grip on the state. Sell the nation and the common man out to whatever fly by night idea that comes by in the name of progress. Smile when telling everyone they are idiots and you know what is best for them. Bribe people with their own money and then keep it. Let's face it, Maritn and the Liberals have what it takes to take what you have.

Layton's Hidden Agenda.

Tax everything at 100% levels so that everyone becomes poor. Implement Social programs that all these poor people can use now that they have nothing. Create a Socialist Utopia where everyone is equal and happy and the workers control the means of production. Challenge the United States and its Imperialistic ways on the international stage. Outlaw western based Churches because of their promotion of blind hatred towards all others. Outlaw marriage, except for homosexuals. A Canadain citizenship program where every child is taken from their parents to be educated by the expert Kadres with degrees from the University of Windsor from age 2-20. Basically, make Canada a bigger and shittier imitation of North Korea.

Duceppe's Agende d'Hidden.

....Seperate from retards like the two above...no, he is quite clear about that. Maybe, make himself Roi du Quebec? Possible. Get laid more often? I don't know.

Harper's Hidden Agenda.

Murder every non-white, non-Protestant person living in Canada on the first day of forming government. Replace the Maple Leaf with a Swastika as Canada's official symbol. Make everyone who is still alive after day 1 wear uniforms. Replace the Queen as Head of State with Jesus. Declare War on the Maritimes for Albertan Lebensraum. Sell everything East of Winnipeg to the US for 50cents on the dollar. Use that money to build the Great Pyramid of Regina 3500 metres high and proclaim himself "Pharoh". Initiate a flat tax of 10%, and then enslave everyone anyway. Burn books. Kick puppies into pits of Molten Lava. Call Satan up from Hell during Occult ceremony to just hang out for awhile. Ban abortion, but murder babies. Dump all Homosexuals into vats of Hydrocholoric acid. Kidnap Osama bin Laden and force him to have a sex change in order to marry him. Lower the GST to 5%.

Seriously, if Harper had had any kind of "Hidden Agenda" before, the way it has been portrayed in the media with such disdain has made it impossible for it ever to be carried out. But this raises a question on the mentality of the voter who does believe it. Do they really think that a man who can't be elected PM despite the nefariousness mismanagement by his political could pull anything remotely resembling what is written above off? He doesn't have the charisma.

Personally, I would like a sane voice that doesn't disagree with having referendums on huge issues which effect the nation profoundly lead the government if only for awhile. If Canada is a "democracy" let me, and everyone else, decide about Seperation, Gay Marriages, Legalizing weed, forcing the NHL back into business, and other important issues.

By the way, my voting record would be Yes, No, Yes, Yes.

Canadian Federal Politics: A Big Joke

The news over the past few weeks as to the political situation in Ottawa has been interesting to say the least. The oppostion is chomping at the bit to put our Liberal masters out of their misery only to have it become a full blown circus...dominated by ass-clowns.

The way I understand it, and attempt to correct me if you disagree, is that the Liberals are spending their last few moments in power to organise themselves for the upcoming election. They've spent the the last little while trying to bribe Canadians with their own money and curry favour with the NDP. Somehow, the comments coming from Liberal MPs that the government is operating "normally" isn't as far fetched as one might think. (Bribing taxpayers with their own dough taking the advice of closet communists). It will only be a matter of time before the Red Machine's Truth Division, based in Montreal of course, hits the ground telling everyone about healthcare, Harper's hidden agenda, the threat to national "unity" and a bunch of other crapola that has been around since the 90s.

Here are my opinions on those three points which I anticipate the Liberals will try to use to regain their hold on the government.

Healthcare

A little Socialism goes a longway. I am totally 100% behind government healthcare. If I break my arm, have a heartattack or get the flu the fact that I can waltz into a hospital or clinic and get everything sorted out is fine by me. Paying a $50 user fee per month isn't the end of the world. I disagree with the idea that $50 hurts poor Canadians more. I think having jobs outsourced to foreign countries, self-destructive unions, no NHL, $10 smokes, Liquor store strikes, taxation on everything hurts poor Canadians more than anything else (15% sales tax when you go shoping for anything?! Get Fucked!). I would rather pay $50/month for healthcare than shitty cable service, but nobody has any qualms about writing a cheque to Rogers on a monthly basis to have shit pumped directly into their living rooms.

Harper's Hidden Agenda

Gimme a break. Do they honestly think that if elected Harper would all of a sudden turn Canada into some Nazi state? Wake up. Not only would such an event destroy any kind of relationship Canada has built with other nations, but the backlash domestically would be too great and the government would be out on its ass faster than taxpayers cash is given to Liberal hacks illegally in Montreal. If Harper does have a hidden agenda, I hope part of it would be to get a personality and maybe a better haricut.

National Unity

The Liberals don't seem to grasp the concept that the 19th century boundaries of Canada have changed and that Canada isn't just the stetch of the 401 from Windsor to Quebec City. Quebec is lost, and they lost it. In the West, especially in Alberta, seperatist sentiments are definitely on the rise. Why? Alienation, perhaps? How would you feel if you went to dinner with 12 people, had to pick up half of the bill and then listen about what an asshole you are? How wrong you are? How stupid you are? How "backward" you are? No thanks. If the present situation continues, Alberta will split and probably take Saskatchewan with it.

It is ironic that voters in Ontario really want Quebec to stay but don't give a shit if Alberta leaves. Will their tune change after their taxes skyrocket to make up for the lack of dough contributed by Alberta post seperation? No. Why? They're morons.

I can only imagine the blame the Liberals will be spouting after the fact. Fortunatley, Albertans really won't give a shit what they say. They'll be too busy running the richest and best country in the world. Full stop.

Basically, the Liberals have shot themselves in both feet. They can continue on with the charade that they are in control and are running the country well, but the fact remains that two regions of the country are ready to go their own way. Let's face it, Canada is Ontario and Montreal to them.

On a side, the last time I was in Toronto, a couple of times when people asked where I was from, or found out that I claim Alberta as my home, they instantly distanced themselves from engaging with me. Everything was cool until I said "Alberta"or they discovered that that is where I am from. Even if someone is from the States, they get that chilly response from wait staff or people they might meet while in town. WTF?

The only thing that might save Canada, not just Upper and Lower Canada, is Ontario and Ontarians checking their egos for awhile and letting the rest of us in.

Okay, here is the challenge. If you can convince me why Alberta should stay in confederation I will buy you a pint of beer the next time I see you. No shit. If I can't refute what you say, I will buy you a beer...that is unless the federal government hasn't brought back prohibition by the time I get back.

C'mon Proles! Get typing!

Star Wars 3: A Continuation

This is a continuation of a rant I starte in the comments section of another blog.

I am looking forward to Star Wars 3 too, but after the lameness of Star Wars 2 I have no idea what to expect. I liked Episode One. The Bad guy was cool, although not in the story enough and Liam Neeson and Ewan MacGregor were great together. Jar Jar totally sucked. He was the super worst thing in that movie. His whole race sucked. His Chief, my God, ghey. If they were Walrusmen living in the swamp in Naboo, that would have been cool. I wanted to like Episode 2, but it was too difficult. Yeah, there was less Jar Jar, but why on Earth did George Lucas think that he could get a performance out of the world's worst actor as Anakin. I remember being in the cinema on the second day it was showing and sitting there with about 200 other people making groaning noises while Anakin "tossing" and turning in his bed. Oh, he was alseep? We all thought he was having a wank. When he started speaking about his mother and then sand people, every one in the place erupted into repressed laughter. It was terror-bial. Wet dreams about your mom with sand people?!

I've seen some of the photos of Episode 3 on the net. It looks cool, but that's what I thought about Episode 2. We'll just have to wait and see. I am away from all the hype that must be building up there. Magazines, commercials, runnings of other Star Wars movies on TV. etc. I don't really know much of what to expect. I can hope that Anakin learned some acting. Seriously, I figure that he will be doing the Sci-Fi convention curcuit in a couple of years if he sucks as much ass in Episode 3 as he did in 2. I hope he realised that.

A long time ago I heard that DiCaprio was offered the part of Anakin but turned it down because he thought Jar Jar was just too fucking lame. Jar Jar is the scapegoat of the entire saga.

Things that will make Star Wars 3 suck hard:

• Jar Jar
• Introduction of Jar Jar Jr
• Jar Jar joins Sith and kills 50 good Jedis by dropping a light saber while doing something totally stupid like getting his head caught up his ass.
• Yoda confiding in Jar Jar as an intellectual equal.
• Anakin has another wet dream about his mom and sand people (really creepy now that she is dead)
• The introduction of a triplet: Larry.
• We find out that Jar Jar is really the father

Things that will make Star Wars 3 redemption for past Lucas Film crimes:

• Killing from beginning to end.
• No Dialouge, except for characters to discuss how their killing is going.
• Dark Jedi army.
• Yoda as a Sith.
• The erradication of Jar Jar and his people.

I guess the sub-plot I am wanting to see is a Sith Yoda leading a Dark Jedi Army to Naboo and slay the Jar Jar People wholesale with brief stops in the action to re load their guns. I realise the last point of redemption and the first point of suck hard cancel out, but we have to see him die. No way would someone just casually mention "Oh yeah, by the way remember that retard Gungan that was a total fuck up? He's dead now. Killed himself by sticking his face in a giant rotating blade." "Dumb Fucker." If that is in the new movie, I'll eat my hat.

I wonder if Jar Jar gets killed off? Wouldn't it be great if people cheered when this happened?

I remembered my friend cried when they killed off Captain Kirk in Generations. I was in shock for all of about 10 minutes after Wrath of Khan thinking that Spock was dead. Fortunatly, my older brother, who is a bigger nerd than me, informed me about how the Genesis Planet blah blah. I don't think I could cry if any Star Wars Character was killed off. Maybe Han Solo, but it would have to be Harrison Ford, and he ain't going to come back.

I'll leave you with this one; What is the worst Star Trek movie of all time? I reckon its Star Trek IV. What do you think?