Unwatchable 80s Movies

This will be a kick for Champagne E and his buddies who are into old "Bad Movies." I've used "old", because as of yet he hasn't reviewed "Independence Day" or "Congo". And, before some idiot writes "I love independence Day and Congo" in the comments section, you're wrong they both totally sucked.

Red Sonja

Holy Crap what a turd! I thought I had never seen this movie before, but as soon as the annoying kid showed up, the bad memories flowed back like water over a government repaired Levee. Not only did they give Conan some bogus name, they used scores of "actors" who graduated from the log school of acting. Bridgette Nielsen, and her tits, played the role of Sonja. You know you're career is in trouble when your juggs are better actors than you.

Clash of the Titans

This movie makes Red Sonja look like Gladiator meets Gone with the Wind. Claymation effects. Stupid creatures. No bleach afterward to burn out my eyes. I gave this movie exactly 6 minutes before I shut it off. I remember seeing it as a kid vaguely, but kids are stupid and don't know when they are begin served a plate of crap unless its literal.

Independence Day

Okay, I haven't seen this recently, but I figure I have to rant about how much it blows. I remember seeing ID4 in the theatre and being caught up in the hype of it all. ID4 is a blatant and crappy propaganda movie that was made for 10 year olds. It's got the crazy trailer trash white guy, the up and coming successful brother, the intellectual Jew and the white-bread war vet President. They all work together to save AmerIca from the aliens. I'm wretching here. Yes the explosions were pretty cool, but the president leading the charge at the end?!! LAME!!! If you think this movie is good, I've got news for you 2+2 is 5, you gullible sack of carbon. This movie insults and assaults one's intelligence on so many levels. I remember when I saw this movie, a girl I was with actually cried when the President's wife died. What an idiot! But, that's OK. She took the juice. They all take the juice.

That's all for now. Listening to the Hockey game over the internet. The Broadcast cuts in and out because of the piss weak Typhoon that is outside. I hope you're all enjoying hockey on TV.

Any other movies out there that you've seen recently that totally blew?

Calling the Commtech Pint Lifters

This is a special message for the Commissioning and Testing Services Millionaries out there and their Vice-President buddy Slurry speech Carl. Seeing as next weekend is a long weekend again, I was wondering if you'd like to get together for a few pints somewhere downtown. I sent an email out, but I don't know how often you check your corporate email, especially if you are on site. I have also asked Maki san and Shimo "Iron Man" mura. Let me know either by a comment or by email.

Things to discuss:

• Crystal Palace
• Owen at NUFC
• Projects
• Bullshit

Mull it over and let me know.

The Lost Update

It has been a busy couple of weeks over here. Conflicting schedules, personal business bullish, work, shit weather, hampered plans.

Work is okay. The schedule has been rather light and some of the new people are at least not retarded. Having real conversation where you don't have to use the internal butchered English translator. Yes, I have to deal with people to whom the concept of a difference between "a" and "the" is incomprehensible. We've talked about hurricanes, Orwell, the price of beer and hockey, yes even hockey...with a Leafs fan. It's a strange phenomenon to suddenly stop using part of your brain. You feel a weird buzz high immediately afterward and reflect on the conversation in depth. At least I do.

We still have cats, or shit rats. All they do is eat and shit. Can I buy this can of beer to cull some brain cells or do I buy this stinky cat food? But they're a lot of fun to mess with. They fight it out sometimes in killer play fights.

Other than that, it's life at full flanking speed as usual.

For some reason, due to some bullshit contract obligation or something (don't fret, the holidays are unscathed) they wanted to use my likeness in their "promotional goods" they send to Universities and stuff. The pleasures of contract work I suppose. Basically, it was on pamphlets and stuff, but the Japanes love their kitschy pens and knick knacks, and I came up and designed my own collector's figure/playset "Lebowski Sensei" that was dispatched with the calendars, pamphlets and other promotional run-off to potential Institutions. I hope you like it.




















"Who's too cool for school?"