What is the point?

You tell me.

Kazaa is fucked

I just started using Kazaa, and in my opinion, it is fucking garbage. At first I was really impressed when two files downloaded almost instantly. I thought, whoa, this is awesome. That thought evaporatd into the ether as soon as I tried to play them and nothing happened. Thankfully, I am not a rookie and I know where and how to locate codecs that make this shit work. The only codec that would play this stuff was on a Chinese military website. I thought "What the fuck?!" too. I don't know what the People's Liberation Army is doing ripping tunes, but I have serious doubts that they share the same taste in music. Maybe they are translating some of the tunes to get their soldiers pumped before they shoot people in stadiums. Who knows?

"Qui Zhe dei Fong, Xi Quey Go Ping, Zhao me Li Tao, Now I Leign in Brood!"

Who knows?

Another reason that Kazaa blows is the search results. My better-half requested this and that from me. So I type it into the search engine and the results I got were not only in left field, but well camped there as well. The search for "bridget jones diary" under "video" resulted in "Alice in Wonderland" by Disney, and a plethora of Porno movies starring Sylvia Saint, and a Duran Duran mp3.

To top all of this off, and as if that shit wasn't annoying enough, the amount of "Gain Corporation" pop ups is fucking ridiculous. Gain is just another information gathering firm that sells garbage like viagra and spyware remover to unwitting consumers and then sell any kind of information they gather to credit card companies, the government, Al Qaida, Satan, Tim Horton's, etc.

Three strikes and you're out. Kazaa is banished from my machine because 1) What they promise to deliver is crap and doesn't work. 2) Try finding anything you're looking for and you'll waste your time and 3) They are going out of their way to harvst your info and sell it to the Penis Enlargement Lobby in Washington.

Now, If anyone trys to jump to their rescue and say "But, hey man, if you get Kazaa Gold, everything is wayyyy better." I would just have to remonstrate what I said in language you can understand.

Alpha Beta Charlie

Today's weather is nice and sunny. I went and paid the phone bill over at the conveince store and bought a bottle of coke. I still haven't eaten lunch yet, but then agian it is only 12:30. Tonight I might go into Tokyo and hang out for a bit or I might go to the video store and rent a video.

Aside from sitting on my ass all day staring at the wall, I've been downloading old war propaganda movies from a plethora of sites. SOme of the footage is great and I had never seen it before (like the invasion of Denmark where all the Danes just sort of stand around looking at each other as the Germans roll through town)I also read the FBI's file on Hitler all 10,000 pages. My favourite was the tip the FBI received in 1948 where the author says that Hitler is building a clone army in Brazil that will destroy Bolshevism and then conquer the moon and mars by 1957. Awesome; Nazis on mars. It sounds like a novel I 'm trying to get my hands on called "The Iron Dream".

I paid my taxes on Monday. I'll get back like $250. The tax rate here is really low like 6% or something. It is the municipal tax which will fuck me around in weeks to come. I've been listening to some really strange music lately and reading a lot of shit on the internet. Conspiracy theories are the best. I've been avoiding the newspapers on line. No, I'm lying. Every so often I check to make sure that there will be no hockey next year either.

Nothing else is happening. I got some stuff I have to do this weekend, but that is about it.

Metal, update you're fucking blog already.

Happiness Pie

happiness and sunbeams and cute little puppy dogs,
these are the things that i've seen with my heart.
life is a happy game, if you don't forget to smile,
but every now and then, your face, it harbours a frown.

sadness is a barnacle, clinging to your bright boat,
you won't let it sink your spirits if you'll only learn to float.
we are all sea captains, sailing on lifes rough seas,
so c'mon on you magellens, come with me i've got pie.

happiness pie

happy tailors, happy workers, happy farmers, happy girls
happy widowers, happy free lance artists, happy welders, happy world
happy drinkers, happy thinkers, happy musicians, happy beautitions
happy mayors, happy pears, happy call girls, happy hula boys

happiness pie
pie, pie, pie
happiness pie

I'M NOT A NUMBER! I'M A FREE MAN!

Today, I officially stopped the insanity. I quit my job for the second time and it was like giant cinder blocks being lifted off my body. I am me again and it feels awesome. Now, I have to quit wallowing in the behavourial sink and get my ass back to work somewhere. Well, maybe next week...

I am just hanging out at the house playing computer games and painting. Pimping ain't easy, but if it's the only gig in town (I'd like to say "Thank you" to my main man in Okusawa Town for pointing out that I'm living off my woman and thus "Pimpin'") Maybe, I'll add it too my resume. Hey, Why the fuck not? At least prospective employers will actually want to see if it's for real, right? Maybe not. Oh well.

Computer games are a total waste of time. I finished designing an awesome mission for Sudden Strike 2 with the built in editor and a few MODs. I designed it so the body count is well into the 1000s and not a piece of scenery is left standing. It starts with the Soviet Infantry charging over the densest minefield straight into the SS Panzer Division "Wiking"'s (pronounced "Fucking Killer") Anti-tank guns dug-in all along a ridge. Once the confetti of flesh settles along the Steppe, an Armada of T-34s descends on the spent Anti-Tank guns. Luckily, the gun crews are armed with Panzerfausts so the SS can do their ecological duty and return tonnes of iron and other metals back to the earth. Having had enough, the Russians send in the paratroopers to take the ridge. That is when it gets interesting and the real battling begins. What an awesome game. You can play either the Soviets or the Germans, and either way it is rad.

Painting has been fun, but I can't find the paint that I am used to. I've been using Tamiya hobby paint, which smells like burnt garbage bags. I also bought the wrong brushes which has been making things difficult.

Other than that, nothing much has been happening. There was a dying crippled pidgeon in the park yesterday that I was going to put out of its misery with a rock, but my wife stopped me. I guess one of the stray cats got it, because it was gone when I went for my walk this morning.

I've been able to control my drinking really well. I had a few beers on Saturday at a party for a friend who is moving to the Phillipines to do his translating job from there. Lucky turd. It was a strange club called "Super deluxe". The reason I use "strange" is because they had a movie of bugs fucking on the entire time I was there. I guess thats cool. Maybe not.

I still think Q107 is lamer than ever. In Calgary, they didn't drag that old shit skit "the Champ" out to fill the time between vomit inducing Joni Mitchell songs. What the fuck is up with this "Today a child will find a gun, take it to school and use it" service announcement? BS. Also, to the fat-scrag on "citizen Q" complaining about people leaving their Christmas lights up; maybe I celebrate the birth of JC everyday and just for you I'll rearrange them to say "Q 107 Blows". Maybe the guy from KORN who became a born again Christian will concur.

Y'know wha'm sayin?

I, Gobot

I am back in Japan to make another assault on the beast. Currently, I am sitting in front of my PC, which I spent the better part of yesterday making virus free, listening to RUSH. I had forgotten how much I liked RUSH until I went back to Canada. It was great hearing RUSH on the radio. Shit it was great listening to the radio...for about 3 days. After about 3 days, one realises that the "Classic Rock" radio station is just a tape that repeats itself. Top-tip to Q107: There are more than 2 Pink Floyd songs and nobody likes Colin James. They never played any old Maiden or Priest either, but if you want to punish yourself by exposing yourself to the likes of crusty Neil Young songs Q107 is for you.

TIM HORTONS WAS A HIGHLIGHT

I am convinced that there is opium in the coffee at Horny Tim's. Everyone goes there all the time to talk about their pick-up truck, their stupid kids or the hockey lock-out. Of course the free newspaper is what gets me in there. It was nice hearing everyone's take on the hockey season. It was sooo fitting that Govenor General Yoda decided to throw her flabby weight around and suggested that the cup should go to the best women's team. My response to her would've been to quote Ted Nugent, "Suck it!"

NEW INVENTION PUMPS SHIT RIGHT INTO YOUR HOME

TV was horrible, if not unwatchable. Of course, without the NHL, and endless highlights of the Leafs smashing their adversaries into the dust, it was bound to suck. Reality shows suck so much cock I was amazed. "Dog the Bounty Hunter", "Growing up Gotti", "the simple Life" should all get new names. Here are some suggestions "Dog the Hen Pecked Homeless Harrasser", "Growing up an obnoxious Guinea" and "Stupid Rich Blond Skanks". Fortunately, there was one show that towered over the rest. The best night time drama ever.

VIDEO GAMES

I played GTA San Andreas and ejaculated in my pants. What a game!!!! It was the best game I have ever played on the PS2 or PC. With each version I can't wait for the next one. The weapons ruled, the bikes ruled, the maps were awesome, it was just ....ahhhhhhhhhh.

I only bought one PC game; Sudden Strike 2 for 4 bucks. NO map editor?!! Lame. There were some other games I wanted to try out, but the big On-line role playing games (like World of Warcraft or City of Heroes) are just too time consuming and you have to pay monthly to play. I don't have neither the time nor the money to burn.

SALVE ET PAX AMICVS

All the buddys were good. Sorry I couldn't see everyone and get out more. Being stuck on the other side of the continent didn't help too much either. Highlight had to be Metal's subway adventure. Everyone just stay away from all those seeds and stems.

POLITICS

Unreal. My advocating of storming some government buildings and starting the revolution to end ceaseless tax thievery and governmental mis-management fell on deaf ears. Everyone applauded the budget, which saved the taxpayers a wafty 4 cents a day. I can't wait until they pass a law requiring the general public to wear hockey helmets, or other protective headgear at all times to keep everyone safe. If all the bogus legislation that has passed in recent years is any indication, everyone would just comply without question. And good thing too! If everyone was wearing a crash helmet at all times, every visitor to Canada would see the general public is made up of retards.

My Home

Alberta is the best province in the...ahem..."confederation", the only debt free government in the world and the only place in Canada where it's perfectly and socially exceptable to voice your disgust with our French Masters.

Epilepsy Medicine is good for you

I have some. In case I have a fit, run for the exits covering your noses I might shit myself.