A Vegan Christmas to all

Well, the sands of time are running low for the Dude. Only 101 more hours until I am on an areoplane quaffing "free" beer leaving Asia behind for a good 3 weeks. I've been in a really good mood for the first time since Kindergarten despite the usual bullshit associated with living amongst, to quote General of the Army, Douglas MacArthur, "a nation of 12 year olds" Knowing that I am leaving has given me this magic like armour, or aura, that deflects the deeply ingrained idiocy I am bombarded with daily.

Now, a lot of you might be thinking, ' What should I have for Christmas dinner this year? What's cool? What's hip? What's now?' I suggest you play the role of western sycophant and have a Vegan Christmas. Now first off, you must refer to Christmas as "Winter Solstice" in keeping in practice with your new and trendy spirtual awakening. I suggest you get the party going with some Soy Nog. Yum. Yum. While all of your old, unenlightened friends are stuffing their faces and getting blood on their hands with sausage rolls, you can enjoy some Veggie Mince pies. Now, for the main course, hold on to your sandals you would be druids, a hearty entrée is a delectable medley of rainbow colors with Curried Christmas Timbales, Cranberry Salsa, Steamed Brussels Sprouts, Symphony in Squash, and Buckwheat with Savory Mushroom Sauce. Abundant and satisfying, each dish is sparked with a richness of robust flavors. There's no doubt this is elegant vegan dining.

"I remember when I was a child, we'd come home from our Winter Solstice Nestle protest and Mom would serve up some Buckwheat in Mushroom sauce. Ahhhhhhh. Memories."

Look, I don't know about you, or your sexual orientation, but I intend to eat the flesh of no less than 20 different animals God put on this earth over Christmas. Beef, Veal, Ham, Turkey, Lamb, Shrimp, Lobster, Crab, Chicken, Halibut, Clams, Snails, Goat, Pheasant, Buffalo, Deer, Panda, Lama, Pidgeon and Cod. Not too mention all the maggots and roach eggs found in a lot of the fast food and pepperoni recycled from dumpsters.

I also intend to get of the wagon and burn it to the fucking ground over the 12 days of Christmas. But I will stay off the cigarettes as I have for the past couple of months, with the exception of the time I fell off the wagon and bummed one off of a cop in Nagoya.

If I don't update this for a while, for what it's worth, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.